Susie Cupcakes

A "David" in the comments has asked me to weigh in on America's Next Top Model, Cycle 7. And I am more than happy to oblige. Your comments make the difference, people!

Well, it was a slow start. I miss the olden days when thy bitch would pour beer in thou's weave. Everyone's so seeeeerious now. Which is only understandable if your mother died in a plane crash, perishing while huddled around you trying to provide warmth for your survival. Then I'm all for serious on ANTM. If your big problem is blue contact lenses, move along.

But the last few weeks have renewed my faith. The show is insane, with challenges that are totally, totally made up. Remember when Tyra used to say that every challenge was based on a real modeling situation? Sorry, but putting a battery powered fan in someone's hair or an elephant trunk on someone's face is not based on a real situation. It's based on Tyra's fever dreams of what she would like to do to Naomi Campbell. Yet I love that they are making this stuff up. I love that they have to walk on a floating, tipsy runway.

Also, I love CariDee:
She's so fantastic in every picture. Also she's from Fargo and has psoriasis. I smell a winner! (If she did win, that would give North Dakota two America's Next Top Models. Is it possible that 29% of America's most beautiful, photogenic girls live in North Dakota? I vote yes. It's all the wheat.)

CariDee totally reminds me of someone....

Ah yes, Yvette from greatestmovieofalltime Clue! This morning as I was eating my Wheaties (North Dakota), I started thinking about who I would cast in a remake of Clue. One of my favorite games is recasting old movies. (By the by: when I say "games," I mean "time-killers.") And CariDee would make such a great Yvette. Can't you just hear her say "But I am scared!" in a whimpering French accent?

Let's do some more!

Oooh, Mrs. White, the divine Madeleine Kahn. This one's easy.

A.J., the gothy cannibal girl. For duh!

How about Mrs. Peacock?

Brooke's got the role! She comes with the headwear already installed.


Miss Scarlett's kind of a tough one.

I was going to say Anchal, because she's definitely ready to step into Miss Scarlett's strapless gown, but...

Come on. Miss J is the clear choice.

And who will play the Butler who moves the players like so many pawns?

This movie would be so good!

I won a ribbon! I'm somebody!

Somebody with a ribbon and a check for $4. Boo-yeah! Mouse got her paws in the shot. Here she is in full profile.


Cute! Also, fat.

Rather than resting on my knitting laurels, I have pressed ahead with some more socks.

One Christmas gift down, 37 to go!

In other news, today Mr. Cupcakes and I bought a washing machine. It gave me the same feeling that I had when we bought a weedwacker back in Raleigh: I am so old. But the washer will bring much joy to our lives, I am sure, just as soon as the delivery men stop laughing when they see our stairs tomorrow morning. After the miracle of having sherpa-like moving assistants bring all our stuff up to our second floor apartment back in January, I am so down with hiring people to move heavy stuff. Also, I hope they are engineers in their spare time because whether the washer will fit up our rickety, narrow, twisting stairs is another story.

But there are more pleasant things to think about, like food! Last night Mr. Cupcakes and I went out on a date to Arugula in West Hartfood. The food was so, so good. I wore my painfully (literally and figuratively) cute red wedge-heeled shoes which turned out to be a tiny bit of a mistake since we had to walk about five blocks from our parking spot to the restaurant, with me taking progressively smaller and slower steps, as though I had been recently released from the hospital after major surgery and Alex was my nurse. But once we were seated, it was fabulous. Mr. Cupcakes will give the full details, but I'll let this picture sum it up:

Mocha toasted coconut creme brulee + Lavazza espresso + pinot noir + cute shoes (not pictured) + a couple of Cupcakes = delightful Friday night.