Thursday, January 25, 2007

 

New, big problem

Today I went to the dentist. I'm not dentist-phobic, but it's not at the top of my to-do list, which is why I went this long without going. And you know what? I should never, ever have gone back because today, I was told that I have

dum
dum
DUM
(that's scary organ music)

MISMATCHED JAWS!

How terrifying! It's like I was assembled from random, leftover parts. Like Frankenstein! Soon I'm going to be yelping out "Putting on the Ritz" and smashing lab equipment and gosh, I don't know what else. What do Frankensteins do with the rest of their lives?

My specific problem is that my upper jaw is, and I quote, "much, much bigger" than my lower jaw. Observe:

Artist's rendering

Y'all, why didn't you tell me?

Sunday, January 21, 2007

 

So I lied.

Yes, Archivalist, I know I didn't blog more regularly. I make a lot of resolutions in my head (all year, not just in late December/early January) and things get in the way. But know, dear readers, that I think of you often, and resolve (ha!) to post more frequently.

The History Detectives filming happened on Thursday, with Elyse as the detective. I think it went pretty well. Look for me in July, looking rather pasty. I wish they had filmed me after my upcoming trip to Florida (hi, Angela!). But Detectives waits for no archivist. I won't reveal what they revealed about the book, but it's AWESOME.

Okay, so now that HD is done, I can get down to making some real resolutions for this new year of the boar.
1. Blog more regularly so people don't hate me.
2. Blog more cleverly so people don't hate me.
3. Actually take pictures of what I knit, because SCupcakes is all about the knitting.
4. Eat more vegetables and fruit, and cut the wine down to a level that would not appall the French.
5. Go to the gym and get ripped arms. I sense a bit of wiggle forming in my upper arms, and they are only going to get wigglier without intervention.
6. Clean the house for 15 minutes a day. I swiped this one from Crazy Aunt Purl, and I think it's a fabulous idea. It's admittedly bad when, while watching an episode of Law & Order, one's immediate thought is not "I hope I never end up in a garbage truck because that's a terrible way to go," but "I hope I never end up in a garbage truck because there is so much cat fur all over the house I would shame my family when they discovered it." This resolution is actually fairly easy to keep since I got my new Swiffer Sweep & Vacuum. It's a revelation. It completes me.
7. Read more books, and listen to more books on tape/CD while I am knitting.
8. Possibly consider cutting down on TV. But not really important fashion/modeling themed shows, obvs.
9. Return Netflix movies in a timely manner so as not to pay $15 a month to essentially store movies on top of the DVD player.
10. Have more fun. Seriously.
11. Stop lying on the blog. After this post.

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